These last few weeks have been late summer the way it should be. Highs in the 70s, with the humidity just right, perfect for a last trip to the pool or the beach; lows in the 60s for perfect sleeping weather with the windows open all night. Colors saturated beyond all belief in my favorite combination of green leaves, blue skies, and red bricks in the shade on a sunny day, colors you can’t capture in a photo on a screen. Quiet sidewalks and empty pews as half the city tries to squeeze one more weekend of fun out of the summer.

The State of Maine isn’t the only place that can lay claim to the phrase “the way life should be.” Not these few weeks.

But not everything is as perfect as it seems. The leaves on the tree next to my desk are already beginning to turn, a sign of stress after a hot, dry summer. The joy of the last game of pick-up baseball being played in the park comes along with the sinking feeling I remember all too well of a school year about to begin. Our late-summer peace is troubled by news of war and violence, and all the anxieties of yet another election year.

This combination of flourishing and stress, of bitter and sweet, may not be “the way life should be.” But it’s certainly the way life is. And as it is with the world around us, so it is with the world inside us. Life is always both good and imperfect. And we are also always both good and imperfect. It’s a part of the human condition that the writer Dave Zahl calls “mixedness.”

When we misunderstand this reality, it has the potential to lead us to despair. Some of us crush ourselves with perfection, thinking that we’re supposed to be all beauty and no mess, that we should be able to do the right things and say the right things all the time, never making a mistake and never failing, and we find ourselves drowned in shame if we slip up. Others think we really are that great, unwilling or unable to see our rougher edges and our darker sides, and we expect the people around us to be perfect as well. A few of us might suffer from the opposite: We only see our failings and our struggles, and refuse to acknowledge the ways in which we’re good. Any of these imbalanced paths can only lead to despair.

But if we embrace the unfortunate truth of life’s “mixedness” and our own, it has the power to set us free. If you’re reading this, I am almost sure that you are mostly trying to be good. I am absolutely sure that you are imperfect. So am I. So is everyone else in your life. (And everyone else in mine!)

I can’t speak for you, I guess, but the more I come to grips with this, the better I feel. I find it easier to take the pressure of myself when I remember that my best efforts will inevitably be imperfect. I find it easier to love other people when I remember that theirs will, too. The more this truth sinks in, the more I find myself set free: free from my anxiety about my own small imperfections, free from my anger at everyone else’s minor failing, free to embrace and enjoy the good things I find all around me, knowing that they aren’t ruined by the bad.

This may not be the way life should be, but it’s certainly the way life is. And—seeing us exactly as we are, and knowing us more deeply than we know ourselves—God has chosen to love us, and to offer us a thousand small reminders of that love.